- A well-timed and well-worded compliment is arguably one of the best gifts you can give. Here are just a few reasons why:
- You can make someone’s day with a few simple words
- It costs you nothing
- It takes virtually no time out of your busy schedule
- You will never run out
- It’s environmentally friendly and completely sustainable
- You can reach almost anywhere on the planet in moments
- In this day and age, it can feel like the world is full of complaints, arguments, hatred and negative energy. Never underestimate how powerful a compliment can be. We all have the ability to spread some joy and positive energy. Try it! You’ll almost certainly create a little good karma, feel a little happier yourself for doing so, improve someone’s mood and, you never know, you could potentially even inspire them to pay it forward. How amazing is that?
- And just to prove the last point, this entire Compliment page was inspired by a random lady in a red SUV. She took a few moments to say “you’re doing awesome” as I was cycling home up a steep hill. It was a hot day and I fully admit I was struggling to make it up that hill. She honestly gave me the kick I needed to keep going. It was a tiny gesture in the grand scheme but she made me smile and improved my day immensely.
- Compliments aren’t hard to give, but here are a few tips to really optimize their effects:
- Be genuine. Make eye contact and say something you honestly believe is true. An insincere gesture benefits neither you nor the recipient.
- Be choosy. Although you COULD give out compliments all day every day, it diminishes the effectiveness if you do. People won’t place as much value on a compliment if they’re given out like candy. Instead, try to choose your moments – eg: when someone did a particularly great job on something or if they seem to be having a bad day.
- Be specific. While generic compliments are generally well-received (eg: you’re a terrific coworker, I appreciate you), a specific compliment shows you’ve been paying attention and makes more of an impact. Here are a few examples:
- Your presentation this morning was fantastic. I feel a lot better prepared for next week’s meeting thanks to you.
- That colour looks outstanding on you. You have great style.
- Your perspective during our brainstorming session was so refreshing. Thanks for sharing.
- Be careful. There are some situations where compliments can be misinterpreted despite your best efforts.
- Complimenting physical traits can be a bit of a minefield if you don’t know the person well. For example:
- Telling someone they have a beautiful smile might be misconstrued as a pick-up line.
- Saying someone has great hair today might imply that other days aren’t great hair days.
- Steer clear of compliments that compare the person to someone else. This includes using a qualifier like “you’re the most attractive person in the office”. Definitely steer clear of comparing yourself to that person. Eg: “my presentation skills are awful compared to yours”. When you compare the person to anyone else, the compliment will lose its impact because you’ve now insulted someone else.
- Try to focus more on accomplishments (chipping in and staying late when a job needed to be done, acing an exam that they studied so hard for, making a delicious dinner…).
- Complimenting physical traits can be a bit of a minefield if you don’t know the person well. For example:
- So get out there and give it a go! Let your coworker know they inspired you. Express your gratitude to a friend who listens when you need them. Let your mom know you’re thinking of her and miss her awesome cookies.
- Heck! Don’t limit yourself to people you know. Compliment your server for doing such a great job during a busy shift. Thank the clerk at the grocery store for working late on a Saturday. Email the guest speaker at your meeting that you really enjoyed their presentation.
